Mama I'm a Big Girl Now

Well, look at that, it took me two posts before I ran out shit to write about.   Bare with me as I try to use as many words as I can to say the same thing, just in a different way.  Let's see how much useless shit I can stuff in this blog post before you realize that I'm just rambling.  Reminds me of college.  But honestly, I feel like I let my fans down and more-so, I let myself down.  Jk idc.  It was bound to happen eventually.  If you need an excuse, I spent the last couple days in Whitewater, Wisconsin performing Lyle the fucking Crocodile for, I kid you not, 1,300 kids K-3rd grade.   Thank God for the drive thru liquor stores.  

I thought I'd bring you to my fave donut shop in Chicago!  Firecakes Donuts is a charming little spot tucked away on the corner of Arlington and N Clark St that specializes in artisanal donuts and a quaint atmosphere.  I stopped by on my day off to grab a treat and a little coffee and this chocolate donut was DEE-LICIOUS!  I chatted a little with the girl at the counter who couldn't have been nicer.  Her name was Rachel and she threatened to call her manager, such a sweetheart!  "Firecakes" is also the word I'd use to describe my ass after eating this donut.   The only downside: I got all that donut powder all over my face!  So annoying! 

 The only time I ever want to lick a brown hole is at Firecakes Donuts!  

The only time I ever want to lick a brown hole is at Firecakes Donuts!  

It's getting cold out there, losers!  I picked out this thermal white shirt from American Apparel and it's warmer than it looks.  I mean, obviously I didn't take these pictures this week, cause have you been outside?!  The oil on my oily skin is starting to form icicles!  Another thing, people get scared of white because it's easy to stain, but most of the stains I deal with are white or clear anyway!  But, anyways, you HAVE to layer!  It's a must! This wooly cardigan is from Banana Republic and boy oh boy is it itchy.  I mean, I'm used to an itch every now and then but god damn.  Big, thick cardigans are really in this season if you're looking to keep up with the current trends.  I could make a "big, thick" joke but I already sound like a diseased whore so I better quit while I'm ahead.

A quick side note, this donut was probably the only thing I ate all day.  Someday I'll give you a backstage pass to my non-existent healthy eating lifestyle.  Mostly it's just me standing in front of my empty pantry and making a wish on the evening star that something other than bread and peanut butter was in there, but thats a different post for a different time.  Another little detail, never been inside this place in my life until these pictures.  Does that make me a liar?  A phony?  I'm not sure, but if I told you that I was doing anything else besides write this fuckin thing, THAT would make me a liar.  So there you have it.  A new blog post.  This shit is getting hard.  I seriously don't know how people have the motivation to do this shit.  Till next time!

May your buttons be as loose as your butt hole,

Love, Peacoats and Poppers

 Photos by Taylor Martin

Photos by Taylor Martin